Cultivating Self Compassion
Building Resilience from The Inside Out
Cultivating Self Compassion
As January continues at snowdrift pace, I take it slow and easy. My hibernation is in full swing. I’ve dangled the fairy lights around my home, and burn bright, flickering candles every day. But there’s still stuff to do, demands to meet, and bills to pay. Coughs and colds threaten from the lungs of others. I think one is setting up camp in mine. The dark clouds dislodge old sorrows that drift in. Memories of betrayals and losses swirl inside when my mood is low. I acknowledge them, and come back to myself with reading, writing, making, and good TV. I alternate hearty soup with walks with favourite friends and my velvet dog. I embrace the curl of self compassion in my heart as I plod forward, and January stretches on.
“You could search the whole world over and not find anyone more deserving of your love and compassion than yourself.” Buddha
Many of us find it easier to feel compassion towards others than towards ourselves. But how can you extend compassion to others if you can’t extend it to yourself? It is the greatest survival skill, even proven to combat low mood and anxiety, and build resilience. It’s the perfect antidote while January does its thing.
“Finding the commitment to stop running from pain is a first step in cultivating compassion. Your willingness to turn towards suffering rather than away from it is the beginning of approaching the world with greater kindness and tenderness…. We are not creating suffering, only looking into it, and noticing it and being with it. By blocking it out, we block out so much else, the light of our soul and our very central-most self, for a start.” Christina Feldman, Compassion.
If we ignore or run from our pain we suffer under its weight. Low mood or anxiety set in, along with their friends low self esteem and avoidance, which only makes things worse. Tending to our pain and selves with compassion is the antidote.
If you notice resistance when showing or thinking about self compassion, be curious about it. If you aren’t ready yet, or it sounds silly, that’s fine too. You can read on and save this exercise in your pocket for a rainy day.
Cultivate Compassion Exercise
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