The Distorted Thought Patterns Harming Your Life
Self Awareness is Power! Reframe Five Common Mind Filters That Hold You Back
Hello! I’m Kate, a therapist sharing weekly Letters from Therapy. If you enjoy my writing, make sure you’re subscribed! If you wish for deeper self awareness, acceptance and meaning in your life, upgrading to paid gives access to enriching discovery tools. Your support also makes these letters possible, thank you!
Dear friends,
Do you sometimes wonder why your life is so much worse than everyone else’s? That you should be xyz by now? That maybe everyone is right, you are pretty useless? That you might as well give up, since the world is set against you?
You might be seeing yourself and others through one or more of the five cognitive distortions I outline below.
Having therapy throughout my psychotherapy training taught me that I could get caught up in seeing myself and others through a distorted lens without realising. A total eclipse of reality in favour of the unhelpful stories my patterned mind liked to come up with.
I found it common in my clients too, who also distorted their reality, sometimes because of what happened in the past, or inexplicably giving far too much weight to something of no real consequence. Ever worried what someone you haven’t seen for ten years thinks about you?
These stories feed low self worth, low mood and anxiety. I still need to check myself to make sure I see clearly.
“I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.”
Mark Twain
Unhelpful Patterns
Our unconscious mind can get in the way of us living our life as well as we should. Its shortcuts can help us make meaning of ourselves and the world around us. But distortions from the past we didn’t know we internalised can rule our choices, beliefs and actions.
These distorted internal filters can be stronger if we spent a long time with people who didn’t value us, understand us, or perhaps couldn’t meet our needs as children. Social media is one colossal distortion maker.
Out of date, untrue patterns can dictate how we feel about ourselves, treading on our potential and our well-being.
Do your windows need cleaning?
Developing Self Awareness
The only escape from cognitive distortion is to take a look inside. Which common filters are making your life, relationships and sense of self unnecessarily painful? By gaining self awareness, we can remove the filter, and replace with a truer story which will set you free.
Is your mind telling the true story?
Preventing Distorted Thinking
Before we get on to discovering your own cocktail of cognitive distortions here are a few ways to prevent them.