I’m Kate, a psychotherapist writing about mental health, for you to explore and flourish in a life you love. Upgrade here for tools, resources, meditations and if you’d like to support my work. Thanks for being here!
Sometimes I need only stand wherever I am to be blessed. Mary Oliver
Hi friends,
I am so enchanted by these hazy days, open windows, lazy mornings and so much light! I’ll keep the mellow balm of August in my heart for the darker months. I can’t find my diary. I don’t know where I put my planner! My routine has fizzled to nothing.
When we lose the structures of the school or work day and our own routines, we can let our bodies lead the way for a while. Lounging a little later in bed with tea. Dog walking at times dictated by the sun or the rain. Lunchtime is when our tummies rumble. Podcasts bring company in the middle of warm sleepless nights, forgotten by morning. Connecting with friends is joyful, serendipitous pot luck.
As August swirls me in her gentle arms, I look back over the hills and mountains of my life. The volcanoes and dark caves seem far in the distance. I turn towards the future, blessed with freedom to create it - for the first time. Now, my luminous daughter will set off for a brilliant University as if it’s nothing. An empty nest beckons, and so do new horizons for us both.
Pausing in August’s tender embrace, I pass the baton on. It’s her turn now. It wasn’t perfect, not even close. I did my best despite fires and ogres, and we picked our way though, full of love and hope regardless.
We can only do our best. There is no more than that.
It’s okay to go slow. To let go, refresh and renew. Humans need rest. Here, we can peek into the periscope. Olympians pause in silence before they run. Moments later they lie, sweaty, puffing, exhausted, face down. Champions of the world.
Now, new energy rolls in as the chirping crickets fade. The land of September lies ahead. I’ve let my mind and body be free, though this delightful indulgence will come to an end. We must find our feet again, and touch the stable ground.
I haven’t written regularly for a month (my latest weekly letters are thanks to some hefty drafts). The ache of backed up creativity strains in my mind and phone notes. To harness those wild horses, I attended
‘s writing group again, helping me rekindle and look forwards. Even the wind has direction. I found mine in these words.How can we come down from the gentle sweetness of August? This is my plan:
Write it out. To get it out of my system: my thoughts and feelings need order and sense. This blank page turned into these words. I write lists of what must be done, for graces new beginning, and for our ending. Practical lists. Scary lists. Beautiful lists.
Acknowledge what is here. For me, the complex joy and loss of the approaching empty nest and all it brings. My hopes for my writing, for my jewellery making, for my friendships - and for my heart.
Create. Be brave and do it! I always need it but it clears my head and lets it out. It combs my mind and channels my energy. Writing yes, but also making, playing, laughing, dancing.
Take good care of yourself. I look after myself and I want you to too. Natural nourishment. Stretching. Walking. Being lazy. Being active. Letting go. I’ll make my body stronger as I approach 50. I wasn’t always so kind to myself. It takes practice if you aren’t used to it. Years sometimes. Demons will come for you if trauma and loss ever shattered you, but you can and will fight them off. Remember the phoenix?
Gratitude, always. I am so grateful for my life, for August, for September and this beautiful balmy in-between-time. I am grateful to you too, reader, I know you know all of this and more. (Read about gratitude here).
Let’s plan. My lists are out. I order and prioritise. (Paid subscribers can find my download with the best and simplest way of structuring your time each week so you are never overwhelmed soon. If I can do it, you can.)
Let’s only be kind. To each other, but more importantly to ourselves. I catch those roving negative thoughts and judgements. Like feeling bad about not having time to record the audio version for this, or get that worksheet ready for you today. “I see you!” I shout - and those thoughts slink away, heads hung low.
I can’t wait catch up with inspiration from some favourite Substack writers, like
, and . I missed and her tribe, and the light filled reflections of , and - and don’t get me started on .All is just as it should be, given what has gone before. Little tweaks make a big difference! When Septembers’ cool energy billows in, I’ll be ready for her.
Love to you, friends! If you enjoyed reading this, don’t forget to click the heart to let me know, and do share this post to help readers like us find me.
What is your favourite thing about August? What are you looking forward to in September? What could you let go of, and leave behind now ready for the next chapter?
Kate
What is your favourite thing about August? What are you looking forward to in September? What could you let go of, and leave behind now ready for the next chapter?
I haven't had a summer break, as I had to keep going for complex personal reasons. It has felt slow, but there has been no let-up like other people, which annoyed me for a while. However, I made peace and took slower days or artist dates when I could. My break to Chicago (to run the marathon) and then off to Hawaii means I'll be away all of October, for which I am excited!! I love September; my birthday is the 1st, which is always my new year. I am ready for this new era, and it feels like it has been several years coming...July and August were the time to finally leap bravely into this new chapter, and I am prepared for it. I loved your piece and sending love for your new transition of family life 💛