1000 Subscribers on Substack! Recovering Lost Dreams
Reflections after Six Months - with 1000 Spellbinding Humans
I’m Kate, a psychotherapist writing about mental health, for you to flourish in a life you love! Upgrade here for tools, resources, meditations and if you’d like to support my work. Thanks for being here!
Dear Friend,
You are one of the thousand humans who pressed ‘subscribe’ here in the last six months (apart from 100 imported, ahem). Thank you for being here, it means a lot! I guess, like me, you want an authentic, soulful life with meaning, good relationships and an expanding sense of self? You want to become more… you!
It’s a good a time as any to reflect on the last six months, on what Substack brought me, and maybe you?
Social Media Grumblings
After the wounding years of Instagram, Facebook and Etsy algorithms, ads and junk, the cloak of disillusionment still sticks like tar on my skin: lost sales; lost followers; lost direction; lot mojo; lost faith. I don’t like seeing snippets of things I never asked for. I dont want to see ads all day long. I don’t like the modern idea of success, bewildering leaders all over the planet, normalising exploitation of other humans, in plain daylight! It takes a special kind of lack of awareness. If only they would consider therapy, the world would be different now, but that’s a post for another day.
As I try not to get crushed under the weight of the complexity of modern life, including chilling leaders debates, I resist temptation to hide in the wardrobe like I did as a child. (I liked being alone in the dark, comforted by the scent of leather as I squashed my mums vast pile of shoes).
I lost my therapy practice in the pandemic, breaking my already broken heart into even smaller pieces. My unused therapeutic knowledge was backed up in my head with nowhere to go for a really long time.
Starting on Substack
I was sceptical about Substack and it took a while to take the plunge. Yet another platform waiting to screw us over with moving goalposts and tat? (Crosses arms and rolls eyes.) I’ve had little reason to be sceptical so far. The bliss of no ads. The beauty of paying creators directly, instead of billionaires. Reading things I choose myself! You gave me your email address, knowing I will keep it safe, and will stay in touch whatever, so we can keep blooming together.
It’s a nice feeling, not being exploited.
I stared at this empty page 6 months ago, with a simple plan to write weekly (which I reflected on after two months here, with some tips if you’re new here). I didn’t know anyone would come, my knotted stomach lit by a tiny ray of hope.
Young Kate Gets a Break
When I was at school, I struggled to read well in class. You know when the teacher calls on someone to read aloud? I was the kid who stuttered and faltered in the deafening silence. Of course, this only made teachers do it more and more, I guess to try and help me improve. I was a bright, popular girl, so this anxiety fuelled humiliation didn’t make so much sense. I now realise it was a symptom of undiagnosed ADHD. I couldn’t concentrate on the swimming words with the over-stimulation of a room full of eyes on me.
This stopped me doing English A level, even though aged 15 I secretly wanted to be a writer, and was top of the class despite the reading aloud debacles. I buried that dream (luckily I had others, which I am working through) and gave English up.
30 years later I’ve written a children’s book. I wrote a course. Now, I have written about 50,000 words on Substack for you. I record guided meditations in an uninhibited voice under a sheet (thank you for the tip
!) I am a long way from the confused kid at school. Have you returned to your childhood dreams?Finding Wonderland on Substack?
Substack are creating a new future for culture, where creators are paid for their work (Substack take 10%). They want us to succeed. We aren’t exploited to line the pockets of billionaires (who, by the way, normally lack the self awareness my members develop here). We like reading. And we like choosing what we consume. We have autonomy again.
I discover inspiring people every day, make friends and find and give support from the most thriving community on the internet. Brave people writing from the edges of life, like ongoing loss, health issues, motherhood and ageing. And there comedy, fun, creativity and love here!
I strengthen my writing voice here, bearing the cringe. I am learning to write!
I found a place outside the therapy room, where tears turns into laughter, isolation turns into community, and hiding turns into courage.
We can shed our skin on Substack.
A Thousand Courageous Souls
You and I find the courage to reflect, because we have seen the harm inauthenticity, lack of self awareness, and unresolved pain can do. We know that despite everything, there is hope, light and love if we want it. We can change if we want it. We accept that life is messy, and painful at times. We make an effort to find our strength and let it lead us.
My own achievement today is to have written here consistently each week for six months. There is a long way to go for me to reach the dizzy heights of minimum wage. If you’ve been here a while and like reading or listening to my posts each week, c’mon friend, support me here. 😉
1000 Substack Subscribers In Six Months - What Really Happened
Working as a therapist for 16 years taught me what’s possible when we reflect on life in greater depth and train our minds. I love to weave therapy ideas through my 40 articles, therapeutic workbooks, tools and 100’s of journaling prompts. Self awareness changes lives, guys.
As well as writing consistently, I started a guided meditation podcast, you seem to like, and record audio for my posts, despite once being that kid.
I stopped being shy about asking for your support. I realise getting paid for work is normal and valid. Some of you feel my work is worth paying for, which gives me fuzzy feelings, thank you. Isn’t it wonderful to be able to pay creators directly? It should have always been that way. Many of you are working on yourselves to create the life you want as paid members, which is highly motivating.
I’ve found a nurturing community here, connecting with readers and writers all over the world. I feel held in my own grief, which still rears its head. I support others writing by sharing, liking and commenting. Be the change you want to see, right?
I attended a talk with Substack queens
and in London, where I made friends with wonderful weirdos like me, spending every spare moment writing on Substack to improve our lives and culture. I think we can, and need to, reset the direction of history. Stranger things have happened.I pimped out my dog, Pepper on Substack notes, like here. She gets more likes, comments and subscribers than I do, so I have promoted her to marketing assistant, in exchange for extra treats. I share snippets from my posts and my life on notes. Some resonate, go viral even (for me), like here and here, some are tumbleweed. Easy come, easy go. Isn’t notes like how we all hoped social media would be once upon a time? Change is possible!
Now that I have readers, I might call myself a writer. My lost dream, dissolved by all those silent classroom eyes has life now, and I will always be grateful to you, reader as you made this happen!
Now What?
I’ll keep learning to write with help from
and . I’ll find inspiration for writerly-life from , and . I’ll discover more about how to build community with , , and . I’ll get some fun and joy from and as I go. I’ll record guided meditations and keep posting weekly, and creating therapeutic journaling prompts. I’ll create more workbooks like the Life Audit and Heal Your Past Workbook for paid in the members tools page.I am teary and tingly as I finish up.
This is your space too. Let me know why you subscribed, and if there is anything you want me to write about in the next six months? I mean don’t worry, I have tons of ideas, I’m practically exploding, but if you want anything specific, tell me.
I’ll be here tip-tapping away.
With love and so much gratitude,
Kate
P.S. you can support my work by upgrading, clicking the heart, commenting, sharing with others and restacking on Substack, all of which are greatly appreciated.
Joining in with
essay club ✨
Why did you subscribe, and what would you like me to write about?
What are your lost childhood dreams? Have you, or would you like to rekindle them?
Congratulations, this is inspiring! I only just started and am trying to figure it all out as I go. I switched on paid subscriptions a few days ago and that took some serious peer pressure/support from my Substack friends here. It's nice to read stories like these 😊